Pacific salmon run

After spawning, all Pacific salmon die, and the salmon life cycle starts over again, in another 4 years.

Goldstream Salmon Run 2016

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How to deal with Stage Fright?

After my 2nd public piano performance , I realize that I definitely have stage fright. 

I practice a lot, and  worked really hard, but again, my hands started quivering on the stage, and I slipped during performing one of my repertoires

Here is what I try to do to control it. The tips are for public speaking, but as an experienced Toastmaster, I know these will work. Of course I will perform more in public to concer the fear:

https://www.adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/social-anxiety-disorder/treatment/conquering-stage-fright
Learning to improve your speaking or performance skills is good, but it’s generally not enough to substantially reduce your fear. You must address and revise any negative perceptions, beliefs, thoughts, images, and predictions related to public speaking or performing. And it’s often helpful to uncover the deeper fears related to being seen and heard by others, showing vulnerability, and being considered less than perfect. Learning to accept yourself and not feeling that you have to prove yourself to others is at the root of healing.

It is recommended that you learn skills to reduce and manage your fear and anxiety and not resort to using medication or natural products alone. It’s also critical to learn cognitive-behavioral methods to stop the cycle of avoiding fearful situations. Avoidance may give you immediate relief, but it reinforces your fear in the long run. 

Try these 10 tips to reduce your stage fright:

  1. Shift the focus from yourself and your fear to your true purpose—contributing something of value to your audience.
  2. Stop scaring yourself with thoughts about what might go wrong. Instead, focus your attention on thoughts and images that are calming and reassuring.
  3. Refuse to think thoughts that create self-doubt and low confidence.
  4. Practice ways to calm and relax your mind and body, such as deep breathing, relaxation exercises, yoga, and meditation.
  5. Exercise, eat well, and practice other healthful lifestyle habits. Try to limit caffeine, sugar, and alcohol as much as possible.
  6. Visualize your success: Always focus on your strength and ability to handle challenging situations.
  7. Prepare your material in advance and read it aloud to hear your voice.
  8. Make connections with your audience: Smile and greet people, thinking of them as friends rather than enemies.
  9. Stand or sit in a self-assured, confident posture. Remain warm and open and make eye contact.
  10. Give up trying to be perfect and know that it is OK to make mistakes. Be natural, be yourself.

Please comment if you have more suggestions. Thanks!

The best way to have a cat

The best way to have a cat is to have your neighbor’s cat.So you don’t need to feed, scoop the litter or visit the vet. LOL.

Actually, I cannot have cats as my hubby is allergic to it.

I thought of having cats outdoors with a heated cat house.

Where I live is +5 degree Celsius coldest in the winter, so this idea may work.

However, I am afraid my cats will play with my neighbors, like Hobo in the picture.

Any suggestions to my cat dilemma?

How long will it take you to recover?

Being inspiring by “How I met your mother” today, I asked him how long he will be wounded if I ever break his heart, just like Lilly did to Marshal. He was cooking some marshmallow bars for me when I asked.

“Dear, how long will it take you?”

“Twenty minutes” he answered without hesitating.

“…” I kept silent for several seconds, thinking it is actually not too bad if he recovers that fast.

“I meant if I break your heart, how long will it take you to recover? It took Marshal 67 days”

He looked at me like an abused kitten “No, I will never recover”. Then he sadly lowered his head and continued cooking.

“Oh…my poor baby…” I opened my arms.

“Anyway…” he raised his head again, and my heart was beating faster for some love words, slowly said he “ If you don‘t have an iPhone, well, you don’t have an iPhone”. (IPhone adverts LOL!!!)